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Author: Pam
Date: 03-03-03 05:52
Hi everyone,, My weekend went okay but was pretty hard to pick the good foods but all in all I still lost 4 pounds last week.. My problem right now is that I'm getting down from getting no support from my husband.. All he knows how to do is tease me about what I'm trying to do and it makes me not want to change my eating habits anymore. He'll also tease me about my body saying things that really ticks me off.. I won't even mention what he says but it isn't very funny even tho he thinks it is.. If I talk to him about what he's doing he'll get upset with me. I just can't win with him.. I know I'm making this change in myself for me but it's so hard to do when I get teased constantly about it.. Any suggestions???????
Pam
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Author: Waveswife
Date: 03-03-03 06:10
I DEFINITELY have suggestions....gag your husband and stuff him in the closet!!!!
Listen, you are doing this for you...and you MUST keep going. We are all counting on you here. You are a part of our inspiration and to see you beat the odds is what we live for here!
Secondly...just think about the "sweet moment" you will have when you reach your goal. What will your inconsiderate husband have to say to that!?!?!?!?!
As I read on my oatmeal package today...The view from the top of the mountain is so much sweeter to enjoy when you can see the valleys you had to cross to get there.
Show him you are stronger than that...his ignorant and selfish rantings will go unnoticed and as long as he knows he cannot break your barrier...he will have nothing to amuse himself with.
I get so ticked when I hear stories like yours..my husband always encourages me. In fact when I was trying to tweek my regimen he was the one who helped me out with it. And this is all in the name of me trying to get into shape to become a cop (which I have to add...he absolutely HATES the career I am trying to get) but he is still helping me reach my goals...no matter where they are taking me...and no matter if he hates where they take me.
You come here and vent on me...personally if you need support...I'll give you some...cause I don't want you to quit...I want you to succeed!
I know you can do it..and you know you can do it...so don't waste another minute listening to what the husband is saying...
IN FACT...challenge him to do it WITH you...see what he has to say to that...if he thinks he's so funny lets see him make a change and see if he has what it takes to do the "healthy thing"
Tell him I sent ya.!!!! ;)
Ww
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Author: Shari
Date: 03-03-03 06:36
Although my husband doesn't say either way if my losing weight bothers him or not, I have hardly any support from my immediate family.
I'm losing on average 2-3 pounds a month. My father says that I'm going too slow and maybe I should try Slim-Fast or Dexatrim to speed things up. I say "What's the hurry?"
My mother says the only real way to lose weight is to eat only one meal a day.
I could go on and one. I just keep chugging along, albeit, slowly. I know in a year or two I'll reach my goal (only 55 more pounds to go I think).
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Author: Pam
Date: 03-03-03 07:28
Yeah,, everybody thinks they have the answer, They probably have never had to lose weight.. My husband thinks his way is the best way and if I don't do it his way he thinks I'm stupid for even trying.. he'll do everything in his power to make me go off my diet but then when I do take something I shouldn't eat he makes fun of me..I've lived with his putting me down and teasing me for over 4 years now and I should be used to it but I'm not.. Does anyone ever get used to being treated that way? I just try to ignore as much as I can. There have been many times when I feel like making a "different" life style change and it sure as hell doesn't involve him if you catch my drift.
Well.. I did my exercises this morning and I feel a little better. Had to really push myself and I didn't do as much as I had before.. I'll do more this afternoon.. Shari,, don't let your family bother you as hard as it really is to do,, just let them say what they want and then you go do what you want. We're all here for you as everyone is here for me too.. It's strange when you can count on total strangers for support but when it comes to your own family where you should be getting the most support you don't get any or at least the wrong kind. I'd love to have a husband like Waveswife has.. You're a lucky woman to have such a man Waveswife.. Too bad all husband's aren't like that. Give him a great big hug for me.. hehe Thank you everyone for all the support I have received on here. I know I'm going to get to my goal this time and I've sure I'm going to have struggles and very deep valleys to climb out of but I'm going to do it with all your support.. Just coming on this site makes me feel like I've succeeded.. THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU..
Pam
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Author: Heather
Date: 03-03-03 07:47
You're not alone in this!! My husband and I got into an argument this weekend because he said I'd never stick to this diet and that I was just wasting my time. You know what I told him? "SCREW YOU!!" I told him I would do this thing with or without his support and that I wasn't doing it for anybody but me!! With my husband, it's a jealousy issue. He doesn't want other guys looking at me when we go out and he's always afraid I'll lose weight and leave him. My answer to that has always been, "why would I want another man???" Ha!!! You stick to this just as I have and if this is really what you want for you....GO FOR IT!!!! You're your own boss and nobody else. When we're smiling from ear to ear picking out our new svelt clothes while they're sitting at home with their guts hanging over their pants then they'll know they were the ones who were being boobs, not us!!!
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Author: Waveswife
Date: 03-03-03 09:21
Thank you for complimenting my hubby, and yes he is very supportive, but he didn't just come this way...lol I have invested almost 11 years in this man...I've trained him the way I want....he he he...He's gonna kill me if he reads this...lol...naw...just joking....
Just remember to ignore the "shortcomings from your husband" and keep on trucking...cause nuthin' ever got done by quittin' :)
Chew the rag to me...I'll listen...and some days..I'll join in.
Ww
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Author: Pam
Date: 03-03-03 09:57
Thanks Waveswife,,It's great to know that there are people like you out there that are willing to listen.. Hope you're feeling better,,
Pam
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Author: miranda
Date: 03-03-03 10:47
The more I hear things like this--and I hear them all the time--the more grateful I am that I am single. (Except when it comes time to clean the gutters.) However, like most people, I've had my share of unsupportive and downright hostile personal situations, so for what it's worth, here's the "attitude adjustment" that worked for me. Weight loss is one thing that is 100% within your control. Nobody else can "make" you eat, and nobody else can "make" you not exercise. Ultimately, you must rely on your own internal resources. Support is helpful, but it is not necessary. This is not to minimize the unpleasantness of teasing, nagging, nastiness, etc., but you have to learn to separate those issues from your eating and exercise behavior, and deal with them separately. With practice, it can happen. It helps to concentrate on how much better you will feel, physically and mentally, if you successfully lose weight, regardless of how others are behaving. People who give you a hard time about your weight and diet usually give you a hard time about other things, too, and there's only so much you can do to change that. But you can change your weight, and the feelings of control and confidence you will gain by doing so will lap over into other parts of your life. So separate the issues, and work on those things which are within your control; you owe it to yourself (and as an added benefit, it will probably annoy the heck out of your husband).
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Author: Sheila
Date: 03-03-03 12:56
You just keep doing it your way Shari! Don't even bother wasting the energy debating things like that w/them. When they offer you advice just say "thank you for caring, I really appreciate it." That'll shut em up! Then just blow off what they had to say and press on your way!! Your right slowly is much better. I've said it before but I'll say it again...I've read over and over again that the people who lose weight slowly adopting lifestyle changes along the way are the people who KEEP it off!! I want one of those people to be you Shari!
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