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Author: Melody
Date: 11-21-04 20:18
disclosure: the following not my view... just a funny I wanted to share.
HEALTH QUESTION & ANSWER SESSION
>
> Q: I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can
> prolong life. Is this
> true?
> A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and
> that's it...don't
> waste them on exercise. Everything wears out
> eventually. Speeding up
> your heart will not make you live longer; that's
> like saying you can
> extend the life of your car by driving it faster.
> Want to live longer?
> Take a nap.
>
> Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and
> vegetables?
> A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does
> a cow eat? Hay and
> corn. And what are these? Vegetables. So a steak is
> nothing more than
> an efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to
> your system. Need
> grain? Eat chicken. Beef is also a good source of
> field grass (green
> leafy vegetable). And a pork chop can give you 100%
> of your recommended
> daily allowance of vegetable products.
>
> Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake?
> A: No, not at all. Wine is made from fruit. Brandy
> is distilled wine,
> that means they take the water out of the fruity bit
> so you get even
> more of the goodness that way. Beer is also made out
> of grain. Bottoms
> up!
>
> Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?
> A: Well, if you have a body and you have body fat,
> your ratio is one to
> one. If you have two bodies, your ratio is two to
> one, etc.
>
> Q: What are some of the advantages of participating
> in a regular
> exercise program?
> A: Can't think of a single one, sorry. My philosophy
> is: No Pain...Good
>
> Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you?
> A: YOU'RE NOT LISTENING!!! Foods are fried these
> days in vegetable oil.
> In fact, they're permeated in it. How could getting
> more vegetables be
> bad for you?
>
> Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a
> little soft around the
> middle?
> A: Definitely not! When you exercise a muscle, it
> gets bigger. You
> should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger
> stomach.
>
> Q: Is chocolate bad for me?
> A: Are you crazy? HELLO ..... Cocoa beans ...
> another vegetable!!! It's
> the best feel-good food around!
>
> Q: Is swimming good for your figure?
> A: If swimming is good for your figure, explain
> whales to me.
>
> Q: Is getting in-shape important for my lifestyle?
> A: Hey! 'Round' is a shape!
>
> Well, I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions
> you may have had
> about food and diets. And remember: "Life should NOT
> be a journey to
> the grave with the intention of arriving safely in
> an attractive and
> well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways.
>
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Author: yockmoma
Date: 11-21-04 20:23
I think I'll tape this to my refridgerator.....
Sue
198/171/ and still counting backwards
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Author: Don
Date: 11-22-04 07:30
Just goes to show you that you can rationalize anything. :)
Don
Life's journey is not to arrive at the grave safely
in a well preserved body, but rather to skid-in-sideways,
totally worn out, shouting... "holy **** what a ride!"
232/166/166
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Author: LeeV
Date: 11-22-04 08:14
Eat right, exercise, die anyway.
lol
220/175/130
Began New Lifestyle June 18, 2004
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