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Author: Lady
Date: 04-08-04 10:02
Okay, here goes....he was really cute and told me all the right things and I didn't think my husband would ever find out......Oh, uh wrong confession! :)
Anyways, It's no secret I'm not losing weight. I haven't posted a different weight in a little over a month. And before that I was at 163 for about a month. I've been stuck here for a while. And it's not a platue. A platue is something that happens when you are stilll doing the same things and the weight stays at a stand still for a couple of weeks. I, myself, am not doing the same things......I began losing weight in Aug. I should show you all the picture of me at the beach that got me going, but I don't want to until I have a recent pic to go along with it! I don't want that to be the only image you have of me in your head.LOL Anyway, in Aug. I started doing slim-fast, then I changed that to a moderation of slim-fast. Their shakes are 200 calories, so I thought why do I have to have a shake, why not have whatever I want that is 200 calories for breakfast. And for lunch, they recomend a shake and a piece of fruit, that's about 300 calories so I'll just have up to 300 calories for lunch. And of course the sensible dinner! ......Well, since probably the beginning of this year, those sensible dinners have turned to "whatever I want for dinner" and more lately, I've been having those leftovers for lunch the next day. All of this has been gradualy changing back to a not so healthy lifestyle. I do try then I slip up, I try, then I slip up. I guess I know how to maintain!LOL But the only problem is I don't want to maintain a 162 pound body. 145 is more what I'm looking for! I have yet to adopt an exercise regimen. I KNOW I should I just haven't! I have no muscle strength! I feel lost and alone. I asked my husband last night if he would help me, he just laughed. He's not very suportive when it comes to all of this! All of my family and friends are either naturely skinny or they're fat and happy where they're at. I feel very alone. I know I have you guys, but it's not the same if you're not here with me. I need a good kick in the butt. I need Gymmy to come visit me for about a week or two and get me started. Mabey then my husband will notice. If there is a good looking young guy working out with me, mabey he'll get his butt in gear and step up to the plate.........I'm sorry this is so long, I just need to get this out. I know what to do, so I really don't need advice on that, I just need modivation again. I need to be held accountable for my actions and amount if inactivity! Thanks for listening!
Donna
Lady
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Author: BFL Michelle
Date: 04-08-04 10:20
I think we all need to get re-motivated every now and then. I'm in my 11th week on my plan (kicked up BFL) and I've felt just what you are feeling now.
When I felt un-motivated before and was just letting myself slip food wise, the Eating for Life book got me remotivated.
About 3 weeks ago I needed another kick in the butt and putting a bikini on for the first time this season got me back in gear. I thought I looked alot better than I really did and realized I was not exactly where I want to be.
As far as exercise goes, I really don't know what's really getting me in the gym every day. Probably fear for one, that I will get back up there again weight wise. Two becasue I'm after a specific look and I know I have to keep on keeping on to get it.
Sometime we need something to look forward to. Can you plan a trip or something and say "OK, when I've lost x amout of pounds we'll do this"?
I was kinda feeling unmotivated and depressed in general on Monday and was telling the friend that I workout with about it and she said "You need something to look forward to". And I realized she was right. I usually have a trip or some type of fun vacation planned by now and this year I don't and I won't becasue we have decided to spend the money on some other things. So, I've had to reach down deep to find my motivation again and what I've decided to do is focus on losing 4-5 more pounds and then taking a maintenace break. So my maintenace break is what I'm looking forward to now. I will continue to work out and eat how I eat now, but losing weight will not be my goal. Gaining strength and enjoying Summer will be.
I ran this by my email buddy and she thinks it's a great idea. It really helped hearing it from someone, my husband agrees too. So, maybe you just need to set a small goal. I'm telling you I think it's a great idea. If you are able to plan something for when you reach it, maybe that will help to bring back the motivation.
Maybe checking out the before and after pictures on bodyforlife.com and eatingforlife.com will help too. I love to see before and afters it makes me realize I can do it to.
Buy a new cooking light cookbook and get excited about eating healthy? Eating for Life is a great book and gives you tons of good information about how and why you should eat.
Put on a bikini or any swimsuit and visualize how you would like to look.
I hope this helps, these are some of the things that have helped me.
139/104/104 - 5'1
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Author: joan
Date: 04-08-04 10:25
Hope you you don't mind a few comments.
One idea, maybe you could begin by choosing a larger number of calories per day than you had been before. Maybe if you do not have to restrict the amount of food you eat so drastically you could stick with it. Then you may lose, slowly, but lose and that will give you the incentive to continue on.
From my experience, going from overeating to a very strict number of calories only sets me up to fail. And if you want to lose 20 pounds give yourself a longer time to do it. Set a goal of only 2 pounds a month. - 10 months.
Anything that makes you feel good about yourself will only snowball. We all know that. One day of success leads to feeling better the next day and so on.
My husband does not give me a whole lot of support in the way of "atta boys". At first it was important to me but now I realize that it's "my thing". It's best to keep it that way - only leads to more satisfaction that I'm doing it on my own.
Exercise? - just take a walk. Tell yourself that's enough for now.
Joan
255/215/160?
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Author: Lady
Date: 04-08-04 13:04
Thank you both so much, I just needed to hear some encouraging words. And the idea of having something to look forward to is a great one. But I think that might be one of my problems. I never do anything, I never go anywhere, nothing is ever planned. About a year and a half ago, my husband and I started our own business, which a lot of people think means more freedom,-wrong! We're so swamped with work and stressed out all the time. We never get to do anything fun. On top of that, we have 3 kids! My husband and I have gone away together 2 times in the 13 years we've been together and one of those times was our honeymoon! If hubby doesn't work, we don't get paid! SO, if we go somewhere on a trip it costs us double amount of money. The cost of the trip plus the money he's not making! So, financially we're traped and physically we're traped! I think that never having anything to look forward to gets me depressed and unmotivated. There's no light at the end of the tunnel, so to speak! I've tried to look at certain dates as goals. And that might be why I feel so down today. Yesterday on the 7th I was supposed to reach my goal of 150. I guess I'm a little off! That of course was if I lost one pound per week. Obviously I didn't, and I need to come up with new goals and new things to look forward to. I just don't know what that can be. Oh well, something I have to figure out for myself! But thanks anyway, Oh and about the Eating for Life book, I saw it at costco and it was $20 bucks! I was shocked, usually books at costco are pretty cheap! I guess I'm the one who's cheap! I need to just get it! Mabey actually spending a little money on myself would do me a little good. I need to just plan a reward for myself for when I get to goal. No matter how much it cost or how much it puts hubby out. I need to have something to look forward to! Now what, is the question! lol...I'll do some soul searching and I'll get back to you on it!
Lady
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Author: Fabulous@50
Date: 04-08-04 14:57
Lady,
The confession was great--a good place to put a bookmark and move on.
From what I get from your posts, it sounds as if you are in a rut. You dropped a good amount of weight, well over half-way to your goal. But apparently you see no pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.
After dropping over 22 pounds you probably feel physically much better; so where you are is "good enough." You see no further benefit in removing the remaining weight because frankly, no one close to you cares one way or the other (I'm reading between the lines here).
I know where you are coming from with the hubby who could care less to "help" you--same here. Although I would LOVE to have that support, I know the I really don't need it--the only support that really counts comes from your own heart; and that is where you need to start looking for motivation.
I think your "plataeu" is a sign that your self-esteem needs a little boost. Starting a little exercise--just walking, will help lift your spirits a bit (make it "you" time). Don't get bogged down by thinking you've got to do a full-blown exericse program--just a walk, everyday, to clear your head.
Then I would suggest you read a few books on lifting your spirits and getting back some self-esteem. Start putting yourself as Number 1 from time-to-time. You don't need to travel around the world, just "get away from it all" at home. Buy yourself something new and special (candles, perfume, some expensive coffee, a new, soft, comfortable robe and slippers); then get a novel and take a few minutes to lose yourself in the story--anything to get away from your present stresses for a while (TV is NOT a good substitute for a good book!).
You are in a "funk" at the moment, and only you can lift yourself out. Take a deep breath, and take back control of your life--you cannot count on others to make you happy, you have to do it yourself.
Take care--start NOW--take a walk and count your blessings.
Fabulous@50
225/156/150
Program Start: May 12, 2003
“Begin doing what you want to do now. We are not living in eternity. We have only this moment, sparkling like a star in our hand - and melting like a snowflake.”
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Author: new me
Date: 04-08-04 18:03
Good advice Fab!!!
If time away from home isn't possible what about a weekend at a motel with a nice dinner. If you want to bring your husband make it a weekend and a sexy nighty. If you need time to yourself then make it a weekend with that fluffy robe and a really good steamy book. Find someone that you trust with your kids who will watch them so you don't need to think about them and just step down from being a mom for a little time.
It doesn't have to be all or nothing! Compromise!
Lynn
194/171/135
"Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss you'll land among the stars"
Les Brown
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Author: BFL Michelle
Date: 04-09-04 07:42
I can understand about the money thing. That's why we aren't taking a vacation any time soon and I've had to scale back on some other stuff. We are my no means suffering, but I'm just trying to cut back a little here and there so we can get some stuff done to our house.
That's a good price on the book at Costco. I paid 24.88 for it at Wal-Mart, THEN saw it at Costco about a week later. You might also try the library to see if you can check it out. I've heard others say they were able to check out Bill's first book BFL.
Fab and Joan gave you some great advice too. You will get past this and start losing again! I know you will.
139/104/104 - 5'1
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Author: Lady
Date: 04-09-04 10:14
Thank you all for all of your encouraging words! I know now what I have to do. I'll get back to you on this subject in about a week. At that point I will weigh 161 pounds!....Now that I wrote it, I have to do it! Otherwise I look like a complete idiot! So,...Stay tuned......
Lady
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Author: Lady
Date: 04-09-04 10:29
You are so right about being in a rut. I feel that I am now at a healthy weight. And there is no urgency anymore! When I was "obese" I felt the need to get the weight off right away! Now I look and feel average. And removing more weight is no longer a health or medical issue, now it's just vanity. And I have never been one to be vain! So, I kind of feel guilty for wanting to be thinner. I should be very greatful for just being alive and healthy. So, it's just something I need to get beyond.
Lady
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